"I Hate Tall People" from Joe Republican



Posted: Sunday, September 26, 2010

by TeamAfro
AfroDaddy.com

Hello,

Michael SteeleI am a Republican and I don't like tall people. I don't know exactly why I don't like tall people, I have just always disliked them. Most of my friends don't like tall people either. I guess that's why they're my friends. I think that maybe I'm a little scared of tall people because I just don't understand what they're about. They do some things a little differently than I do and people that are different scare me. Maybe I'm scared that somehow they might touch me or breathe on me and make me tall too.

I'm lucky to belong to a political party that for the most part hates tall people also. I'm also lucky because we Republicans have a lot of political clout. On Wednesday my leaders unanimously decided to discriminate against a whole group of people in the military, just because of who they are! I can really relate to that. Just think if we let tall people in our military. I mean its ok when tall people are scrunched down and conceal their height, but when they stand up straight and proud and let everyone see that they are tall well that's a BIG problem. Being openly tall could spell disaster for the military. I mean, who knows what a tall person will do with a gun! We all know that tall people will be a terribly negative influence on the short and average height people and God knows we can't have them spreading their crazy stories about tallness.

It is kind of funny that as a Republican I don't like tall people because there are a lot of tall people in the Republican Party. Every time I turn around there is another story in the news about a tall Republican standing up straight in public. How disgusting! How can we carry out our campaign to hate tall people if we have so many tall people in our own group? Oh, well. I can't concern myself with these things. I just know that I have to keep on hating tall people because my party tells me I have to.

If there are any tall people reading this letter, I'm sorry that I think you are not good enough to defend this country. If our country ever gets overtaken in a war and you are standing next to me with a gun and I need you to kill the enemy before I get killed, I give you permission to step aside and let me get my f**ing head blown off. After all I vote with my party, and we unanimously say that you are not qualified to protect me.

In closing, I would like to tell all the tall people in the world how I really feel about interacting with you. Tall people - just stay home. As a Republican I can legally discriminate against you openly exposing your height in the military but unfortunately there is no legal way we can stop you from getting a job, or going to a movie or breathing our air. Don't get me wrong, if we could legally stop you we would, but unfortunately we have too many of those damn liberals and minorities advocating for a fair society without the blatant prejudice that I love so much.

With sincerity, racism, hatred, and true intolerance

Joe Republican

P.S. I hate blue people too!
Team Afro is the writing team for AfroDaddy.com - The Black Man's Survival Guide. The website is http://www.afrodaddy.com and you can reach the author of this article at teamafro@afrodaddy.com

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